Let’s Talk Privates

Privates. Sex education. Anatomy.

Privates

These words have been echoing through my mind since 5.30ish am this morning and it is still reverberating in my head as I type this.

Regardless of how much I try to get it right, I must confess that I am just a clueless mother trying to make her way safely through the parenting maze; this is one of those moments where I feel I should have taken another turn through the hazy maze.

I am hinting at sex education and the appropriate time to discuss the human anatomy (in depth) with young children. I am not even talking about sex education yet even though experts advocates initiating the talk in early childhood.

When did you start talking to your child(ren) about sex? or when are you planning to start the talk?

Hardly would a day go by where there is not at least 5 reports (from both sides) about somebody accidentally touching the other’s privates while playing hard and hardy would a day go by without mummy asking some probing after-school-questions about anybody touching anybody’s privates (whether by accident or not) in school.

So the ‘privates’ talk is well known and loved in my house and we pretty much live by this simple rule:

Thou shall not allow anybody touch your privates, except your parents.

And if anybody touches your privates (by accident or not), be sure to let them know that it is not right and later tell mum and dad about it.

So, this morning just as were getting dressed, the discussion somehow shifted to talks about their ‘privates’ (again) when my 5yr old chipped in,

”mummy has three privates, is it not true..mummy?”

”Three privates?”

And he proceeded to gesticulate and pointed at the three for emphasis.

”Your breasts, your penis and your buttocks”

Blimey.

I have a penis now? Never knew about that before now.

And it got me thinking…about how I completely forgot about the differences between a penis and vagina simply because I am the only female person that has a different anatomy in the house.

pssst…we don’t throw that ‘v’ word around here.

But not anymore. I think this is the moment of education, to teach these lil men that women do not have penises but vulva / vagina.

If we are not shy to talk about penises, then we should be (decently) outspoken about vulva and vaginas.

A part of my brain is telling me I should have done this earlier and build the foundation for educating them about sex.

But today is a good day to start.

 

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Biola Leye

Wife, mother, writer, leader, entrepreneur and lover of all things good.

7 thoughts on “Let’s Talk Privates

  • April 28, 2016 at 4:14 pm
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    hehe my boy is two and often says mummy has boobies. he then says daddy has boobies hehe #coolmumclub

    Reply
  • April 28, 2016 at 9:42 pm
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    Ha ha, I’m dreading these chats! Last time Tigs mentioned the Penis in our house (daddies) she asked why he had a tail…
    Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub

    Reply
  • April 29, 2016 at 8:01 pm
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    Always helpful for young parents. Thanks for sharing with the Thursday Blog Hop!

    Reply
  • April 29, 2016 at 11:16 pm
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    Good on you for talking about it. I think the earlier you can start the better. My son (2) has just started to become aware of his penis and says ‘mummy’s touching my willy’ sometimes when I change him, so I used that as an inroad to talk about how others shouldn’t be touching him there (unless they are changing him). I know it’s super early but I think it helps lay the foundations. #CoolMumClub

    Reply
  • May 7, 2016 at 5:37 am
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    I have a five-year-old son and a two-year-old daughter, and we talk about how no one should touch your private parts and that private parts are anything covered by a bathing suit. My son is very curious, but my daughter just says she has a “girl dingy” and my son has a “boy dingy.” I’m trying to avoid discussing why they’re different with my son. 🙁 Please share your tips for discussing it! #PoCoLoCo

    Reply
  • May 13, 2016 at 4:03 pm
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    I think you’re right, we talk to them about their own ‘willies’ or penises and it’s normal but when it comes to the vagina we shy away. I talked to both my boys about the differences between men and women when they were both around 5. LP, who is now 7, still thought that I had a penis and was shocked when I told him (again) that I didn’t. His response? “Can I have a look?” all I could do was laugh.
    Talking to them about the differences is a good idea… the sex education can come much later.
    Thanks for linking to #PoCoLo

    Reply

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